I shouldn't post this here first.
But something about the anonymity (despite the fact I know a great deal of locals keep tabs on me right here), makes it easier. Or maybe, because I don't need to speak a word to have my say.
Yesterday, the BF and I decided to seperate. As far as I am moving out and finding my own place. My own way in life.
8.5 years.
I knew it was coming. I tried to fight it, tried to wish it different. Worked really, really hard to keep it all together.
I keep thinking back to years ago when I read a "Self-Help" book. I hate those books. But the author said "Stop rowing". And if you stop doing all the rowing in the relationship, do things stop moving? Are you doing all of the work?
It seemed to have gotten that way. I was willing to never stand up for myself to try to keep from a fight. And then when I did fight, he never seemed to fight fair. As he got more and more irritated with me, I was drowned in a mess of guilt and hurt and desperation. I can say, honestly, I believed I could change. Into the person he wanted.
The problem, was that I did. Only he never seemed to change himself. And I watched as he became more and more bitter at me. The harder I tried, the more I tried, the more hurt I became. And the further apart we difted.
I'm not faultless, but as the years went by, I went from feeling pretty darn special and wonderful, to have a really low self-esteem. I was never good enough. Could never get anything right.
It gets to you. I was scared to do things, because I was scared to screw them up. It was inevitable wasn't it?
These last couple of months, I've been finding my inner strength. I put in so much of myself into that horse trailer, and proved a valuable lesson to myself: "I AM STRONG". I can do anything, and I am a capable, competent and talented person.
That's what gave me the strength to confront him. And while the words hurt, and the pain still stings, I, when in the light of day, feel freed. The hurt is there, but it's mine. It's not crying at night and not knowing why. Not knowing why I was yelled at, or why he wouldn't speak to me, or wondering if it really was so terrible that I didn't do something so basic.
It's a raw pain. I believe he said it was like ripping a wound wide open, so now it can heal.
I cry a lot. I was living for the future. The house we would build, the family we would create, the dreams we would find together.
I let myself be trodden on, because I wasn't willing to give up those dreams. I hoped, and prayed, that he would come around.
I actually devalued myself by doing it. Today, I'm finding my worth again. And it's hard. But I will not, never again, let someone take me for granted. Nor will I let them not appreciate the wonderfulness of who I am. I will never again be scared of someone or of standing up for myself. Speaking up for myself. I will not be belittled or made to feel anything less than wonderful. I can't. Never again.
I'm not sure where I'm going or what I'm doing from here. I have my dreams. Always my dreams. And I will not let go of them. I'll find my way, as I always do. I will have my creatures. Those creatures that carry me through the dark times. The rough times. My Halo, the best piece of white fluff around. I will never leave her. I need her by my side.
And Mr. Moon. It's hard when your creatures remind you of that person. I still love him, he still loves me. But we have things to work on. And I don't know anymore if I'm willing to give up another 8 years of my life to go nowhere. To be hurt again. Love, is strong. But love can't hold you together. Everyone needs to row the boat.
Mr. Moon is a huge part of my world. A necessary part. I'll ride more, sink myself into the training and horses and that part of me. I'll do what I can, and know that no matter what my future holds, I'll have taken the time for the things that I love.
I may write off and on for the next while. I don't know. It'll be less pony-ish I bet, as I'll be caught within my personal turmoil. Where to live? What to do? How to rebuild my personal strength. 8 years is a very long time. A long time to lose yourself. My entire "planned" future is no more, and I must struggle to set the present right. Only then can I start my journey to what I will become.
Whatever that may be.
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Approaching "Normal"
Yesterday, was trim day.
I arrived at the barn and was pleasantly surprised that H and C had brought all the horses up to the arena for us! So it literally took no time to catch Moon.
JOKE!
The little bugger ran away from me, sparking the herd into a rip-roar around the ring. Unimpressed, I chased him off a few times until he stood like a gentleman for me to clip the lead on. He can be such a brat (and I love it).
I should mention, he also took the time to jump one of the x-rails still out as he made his first mad-dash around. Silly pony. Silly jumping pony.
You'll recall, his ugly leg wound. Yes, he's still running and jumping like a moron. Can't hurt too much anymore, can it? : P
The farrier trimmed him up, commenting on how nice his hooves were looking. With the hot dry weather, a lot of horses are cracking, splitting and chipping away their hooves. Mr. Moon has a couple vertical striations, but none of them are through the hoof wall nor splitting out. Just nice rock solid feet, holding their shape better then they ever have.
Farrier confirmed that he likely did blow an abscess out his coronary, though it's already starting to grow a bit down the hoof wall. She said it was a pretty small one, and really, with his other lameness, it wasn't really noticeable. He certainly hadn't seemed to be in pain prior to his scrape.
Wish I knew the root cause, but such is life.
After his trim I took him into the ring and lunged him. Yes, stalker-N (you know who you are), I lunged him. No, it was not pretty, so I'll probably hold off on the mounted shooting for now. ; ) But he did manage to walk-trot around me in a 15 m circle, only once or twice stopping to stare in at me.
Going right, he actually looked nearly back to normal. Going left, there was a slight nod if you really squinted. His canter had looked nice earlier and he was sound at a walk. I was also lunging in the deeper sand, so I'm confident he's nearly back to normal. 85% perhaps?
So this weekend I'll just stick to practicing our loading, and give him a little more time to heal. I'll be away next weekend quading in some beautiful country, so if I can get out three times next week, I'll just put some light walk-trot work on him. Then we'll have one week to get ready for...
GYMKHANA!
Yup. We signed up to do the horse events (Stake race, Quad poles, Flag, Keyhole and Poles, Egg & Spoon, Ride & Run, Mailbox, Clothing Race, Walking Race) and I'm really looking forward to it.
I believe this will be our first "hauling", since if he refuses to get back into the trailer, I can always just ride him home!
I'm a little nervous, but will pull out the barrels, tires and mail-box this week and start getting him used to the items. Worst case, or any case, we focus on the experience, more then the competition.
And I'm super excited!
After Moon finished his supper, I put him away (with a kiss on his schnoz) and packed up a couple of grooming items for the trailer. It was time to put some finishing touches on it!
__________
I trimmed away the plastic that was stuck in the caulk, vacuumed the whole trailer, installed the rubber mats, greased the divider pins (ick), lubed the rear door handles, added little foam blocks to anything that would bang around, and packed up my storage bins with all my necessary trailer supplies!
Four things left: 1) The interior light...BF got home late last night. 2) The clearance light (will do when we hook up to haul out) 3) The jack wheel which the BF is modifying today (I just got him the measurements), and 4) The hook for the grooming bag, which I'm stopping by Princess Auto today at the FAR end of town to hopefully buy.
While I'm at it, I want to buy two wheel chalks, some magnetic hooks and magnetic lights (to put under the tack area). And then really, it's done. ; )
...kinda...
I'm wondering if I should sew up some breast bumpers...not that they're "necessary" or they need to go in before I start using the trailer, but...
; )
___________
Of course, I need to thank everyone for the compliments on the Moon-Mobile. : ) I'm obviously a bit prideful over it, but I do appreciate the fact that everyone thinks it turned out! Now if only I could keep it poop-free... ; )
___________
So that's life. Next week things will be back to normal, with the exception that I'll have a horse trailer on-site and will be free to roam.
We've got plans to get into our next fun show, we're hoping to convince H to go for a little jump course with us once we're sound again, and I really need to find another project ; )
Happy riding folks!
JOKE!
Bugger.
The little bugger ran away from me, sparking the herd into a rip-roar around the ring. Unimpressed, I chased him off a few times until he stood like a gentleman for me to clip the lead on. He can be such a brat (and I love it).
I should mention, he also took the time to jump one of the x-rails still out as he made his first mad-dash around. Silly pony. Silly jumping pony.
You'll recall, his ugly leg wound. Yes, he's still running and jumping like a moron. Can't hurt too much anymore, can it? : P
Healing rather nicely. Thanks H, for all the help!
The farrier trimmed him up, commenting on how nice his hooves were looking. With the hot dry weather, a lot of horses are cracking, splitting and chipping away their hooves. Mr. Moon has a couple vertical striations, but none of them are through the hoof wall nor splitting out. Just nice rock solid feet, holding their shape better then they ever have.
Farrier confirmed that he likely did blow an abscess out his coronary, though it's already starting to grow a bit down the hoof wall. She said it was a pretty small one, and really, with his other lameness, it wasn't really noticeable. He certainly hadn't seemed to be in pain prior to his scrape.
You probably can't really see it, but the abscess was there on the left. Trust me. ; )
Wish I knew the root cause, but such is life.
After his trim I took him into the ring and lunged him. Yes, stalker-N (you know who you are), I lunged him. No, it was not pretty, so I'll probably hold off on the mounted shooting for now. ; ) But he did manage to walk-trot around me in a 15 m circle, only once or twice stopping to stare in at me.
Going right, he actually looked nearly back to normal. Going left, there was a slight nod if you really squinted. His canter had looked nice earlier and he was sound at a walk. I was also lunging in the deeper sand, so I'm confident he's nearly back to normal. 85% perhaps?
I think he'll survive...
So this weekend I'll just stick to practicing our loading, and give him a little more time to heal. I'll be away next weekend quading in some beautiful country, so if I can get out three times next week, I'll just put some light walk-trot work on him. Then we'll have one week to get ready for...
GYMKHANA!
Yup. We signed up to do the horse events (Stake race, Quad poles, Flag, Keyhole and Poles, Egg & Spoon, Ride & Run, Mailbox, Clothing Race, Walking Race) and I'm really looking forward to it.
I believe this will be our first "hauling", since if he refuses to get back into the trailer, I can always just ride him home!
I'm a little nervous, but will pull out the barrels, tires and mail-box this week and start getting him used to the items. Worst case, or any case, we focus on the experience, more then the competition.
And I'm super excited!
After Moon finished his supper, I put him away (with a kiss on his schnoz) and packed up a couple of grooming items for the trailer. It was time to put some finishing touches on it!
If he wasn't sunk into the sand, you'd notice that his tail now reaches past the ground! LOVE! Plus the dapples!
(please ignore The Big K, who's pooping in the background)
__________
I trimmed away the plastic that was stuck in the caulk, vacuumed the whole trailer, installed the rubber mats, greased the divider pins (ick), lubed the rear door handles, added little foam blocks to anything that would bang around, and packed up my storage bins with all my necessary trailer supplies!
Four things left: 1) The interior light...BF got home late last night. 2) The clearance light (will do when we hook up to haul out) 3) The jack wheel which the BF is modifying today (I just got him the measurements), and 4) The hook for the grooming bag, which I'm stopping by Princess Auto today at the FAR end of town to hopefully buy.
While I'm at it, I want to buy two wheel chalks, some magnetic hooks and magnetic lights (to put under the tack area). And then really, it's done. ; )
...kinda...
I'm wondering if I should sew up some breast bumpers...not that they're "necessary" or they need to go in before I start using the trailer, but...
; )
___________
Of course, I need to thank everyone for the compliments on the Moon-Mobile. : ) I'm obviously a bit prideful over it, but I do appreciate the fact that everyone thinks it turned out! Now if only I could keep it poop-free... ; )
___________
So that's life. Next week things will be back to normal, with the exception that I'll have a horse trailer on-site and will be free to roam.
We've got plans to get into our next fun show, we're hoping to convince H to go for a little jump course with us once we're sound again, and I really need to find another project ; )
Love this boy...even if he kinda looks like a donkey in this picture ; )
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Limitless.
And now...
For the post you've ALL been waiting for!
It's been a LONG couple of months. Busy, hectic, and as usual, projects ALWAYS take longer then you anticipate. Okay, it actually took less time then I anticipated, but longer then I wanted. Funny how what you want and what you expect are not always the same.
Last night, after paying the insurance on the car and pony trailer, stopping for groceries (and winding up standing at the cash for 15 minutes waiting for the Supervisor to come off break, because the cashiers can't ring through more then $8 in coupons...I had $24 : ) ), stopping to buy the last hook I needed (and discovering they were sold out!), I got home just before 7 pm.
Scarfed down some supper (or a close approximation) and headed outside. I WANT THE PONY TRAILER FINISHED!
________
Cut the last two pieces of diamond plate without making too big of a mess...I think I'm finally learning how to cut a straight line... ; ) ...kinda...
Riveted, and riveted and riveted. Seriously, my hands ache. I struggle to make a fist. So if you're gonna piss me off, do it today!
As I was putting the screws into the diamond plate on the rear doors (realizing that they'll keep the boards in place), I apparently had the torque setting *just a wee bit too high*, and snapped the head RIGHT off the screw. Leaving the post behind, lodged in the wood.
Now, today, in hindsight, I *probably* could have just pulled out the board (since it's the bottom one, that's only secured by the screw...which was snapped), but yesterday, I didn't have such clarity...
Instead, I drilled it out. It was a LONG process. Screws are HARD. I even snapped another drill bit. Oye. Gonna owe a LOT of drill bits...
Remainder of screws in, both diamond plates on. Success.
Spent a lot of time affixing the door-hold-openers (what's the technical term?!), making sure A. I put them on the right way! and B. They worked.
Then it was getting dark, so I quickly caulked everything, all the diamond plate, the door holders...
Still had the saddle rack to install...
Got that finished by twilight...
Squeezed the clips onto the trailer chains...I had bought the LAST two blue ones at the local store on my way home! And made it there 5 minutes before they closed! Bought the clips there too (very nice, strong clips), and made the mistake of perusing the discount bin...picked up 2 more bridle hangers (for the future barn since they were $1.75 each), a blanket rack (the chain style for $5), and another choker chain for the dog (which turned out to be too small...but it was $1, so big deal). REALLY happy to finally have those trailer chains though!
Clipped the chains onto the trailer and stood back.
And then peeled all the plastic protector sheets off the diamond plate. SHINY.
The list of To-Do's?
1) Install Rubber Mats
2) Install Steel Plate in Tack Room and Rear Doors
3) Drill hole for interior light and Install (already wired)
4) Hook up trailer, connect clearance light and rivet
5) Find a hook for the front door....if only I hadn't misplaced the ones I bought...and rivet on.
6) Trailer jack wheel...rig something up for that one.
FINISHED!
Seriously, I'm considering it finished now! The minor things I'll knock off tonight, and voila. FANCY TRAILER!
I had dreamed of hauling it out tonight, but can't and I still have those 6 things to finish off. And I might caulk the rear door boards just because I still have caulking left. Oh, and I have to cut the plastic that I accidentally got stuck in the caulk. : P
But really, it's finished. DONE. Complete.
Saturday it'll likely roll out to the barn, ready for loading practice. Maybe my boy will be sound by then...
; )
Maybe.
And what's the big dream now??
HAUL!
___________
Some of you, reading this, looking at the pretty trailer, might think, "Hey, I could do that! Take a $900 trailer and turn it into a beauty".
Last night, at 10:30 pm when I finally got inside and plunked down at the kitchen table with a bottle of water, I would have told you DO NOT DO IT.
It's a hell of a lot of time and effort. It's difficult. You WILL screw something up. Things won't be perfect. It'll cost money. You'll be sore and aching. Blood, sweat and tears. Literally.
Is it EVER worth it?!
Yes.
At 10:31 pm, I would have told you to go out there and do it.
Why? Why if it was so exhausting of a process?
Because I rock.
Tell me it isn't gorgeous. It's alright, I know it is.
What?
I rock. The trailer, isn't anything more then a testament to my awesomeness. And I'm pretty awesome.
I don't mean that in a cocky way. What I mean, is that THESE experiences, are what makes you. I caulked for the first time on this trailer. And did a really nice job. I cut sheet metal, riveted, drilled, measured, toiled, wired, crafted, created, modified and painted. It may seem silly, but I'm so much more capable, more independent, more sure of myself because of it.
I did this. Okay, I had help with the painting and the wiring. But overall, it was MY project. My success. My accomplishment.
Like my pony.
It's easy to pay people to do things. It's easy to ask people to do things. It's REALLY hard to do things yourself and learn in the process. But I can promise you, it's worth knowing you can do it.
My mentor last week, commented on my level of confidence this year. And how much I've changed since we met. I used to be meek. Tentative. Now, I sorta just stride into his office, shut the door and make my opinion known.
I strode into my boss' office the same way. I'm striding through life that way. YES, I make mistakes. The horse trailer is RIDDLED with them. I can point every one out. But every one taught me something. And I kept going.
The final product? Looks awesome. To hell with the mistakes. They're mine and I own them. And I'm proud of them. I'll even point them out to you if you ask. 'Cause I learned to fix every one of them. On my own.
Not sure what my favourite part is...all of it??
The mentor had made a comment to me, that sticks really close to my heart. He said "As children, we think we can do anything, be anything. We dream and believe it will be reality. And then we grow up. At some point in our lives, we stop believing. We find limitations; a ceiling to our own potential."
"Sandra, the ONLY limitations in life, are the ones you place on yourself. You're no less capable, have no less potential today, then you did when you were a kid. Believe in yourself, dream big, and life will find a way to make it happen."
It sticks with me. Do not be limited. Do not tell yourself you can't do something. Just go out there and do it. Even if it's restoring a 1974 Blair Horse Trailer.
...maybe ESPECIALLY if it's restoring a 1974 Blair Horse Trailer.
: )
Enjoy:
Old, rusted, dirty hub (it was actually a dirt film!)...and new, shiny hub!
Trailer tie, matching of course. : ) Pressure treated feed bunks.
My wiring! : ) Yup, I got to rig this part up, all by myself! So if nothing works...my bad. ; )
The jack, awesome new break-away module AND my really expensive, but gorgeous 7-pin plug, complete with brushed steel pistol grip and holder! Yes, it WAS worth it!
Even pretty from behind.
Yup, I hung a Canada Flag out the front. Ready for the Olympics...
SOO excited to hook-up and haul out!
Wait till her new tires are on!
Okay, so once the new tires are on, this'll be sweet looking. Look how SHINY that cap is! Remember, there's new electric brakes back there, another thing missing from a lot of these trailers!
Looking forward; can't wait to park Moon in here, and chase our dreams, together.
Sweet tack room. Three bridle hooks and my "stolen" folding step stool. Just gotta rig in my tack bin...
Folding saddle rack! Will add a piece of foam to keep it from banging around. But it works, fits and is pretty sweet. WAY better then leaving tack on the ground!
Beautiful rear door panelling and trailer chains (I like saying "bum chain" too much...). Gorgeous. No pooping in here.
Interior light. Hanging. WILL finish! And it'll be a SWEET addition! (seriously, how many of these little trailers have interior lighting?!)
Yup, I even made my own custom magnetic decal. Yeah, hand-made that puppy!
Custom decal. Custom paint. Custom trim. CANTERING CUSTOMS.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Imagine That.
I have to say, I love when non-horse folks write about horse stuff...
Our National Television Station wrote an article on Eric Lamaze's choice for the 2012 Olympic games, following the unfortunate loss of Hickstead.
The article states:
The reigning gold medallist in Olympic show jumping has decided on Derly Chin de Muze as his mount for the 2012 London Games. While the nine-year-old Belgian mare is a promising horse, she's not in Hickstead's league.
Now, horse folk, like me, read: "Belgian Mare" and think, Belgian horse. Belgian Draft Horse. THE Belgian.
Our National Television Station wrote an article on Eric Lamaze's choice for the 2012 Olympic games, following the unfortunate loss of Hickstead.
The article states:
The reigning gold medallist in Olympic show jumping has decided on Derly Chin de Muze as his mount for the 2012 London Games. While the nine-year-old Belgian mare is a promising horse, she's not in Hickstead's league.
Now, horse folk, like me, read: "Belgian Mare" and think, Belgian horse. Belgian Draft Horse. THE Belgian.
...and suddenly there's a mental picture of Eric Lamaze doing an Olympic jumping course on a Belgian.
: O
Really?!
Next time, Belgian Warmblood would be a more appropriate definition. Though the imagery is less amusing...
: )
Soo Close!
I *really* wanted to surprise everyone with some pictures of my completed horse trailer. You know...the one that I bought in January and swore I'd have finished by May 1st? Yeah, that one.
That's still not done.
So Monday morning I was up before the sun rose (almost) and was out the door to buy my rivets. Showed up at Fastenal 5 minutes before they opened and waited...
...and waited...
And tried the door twice, because I needed rivets.
Just as I got back in my car and was going to drive away (it was 10 after Seven), some kid drives up on a scooter, parks on the sidewalk and unlocks the door.
I told myself it's probably the first time he was late to work. That's it. He's just not some kid who can't arrive on time and leaves customers outside waiting.
...but judging by how difficult it was for him to find me the right rivet...
Regardless, I bought 100, thinking I only needed 50 (they wouldn't do any less, and they're normally sold by the box of 500), and some new jigsaw blades to cut the diamond plate, and was out the door and headed home.
Right away I started caulking and did all the stuff that needed doing. So the trailer is officially caulked.
Then I had a quick breakfast (1/2 bowl of cereal) and was out the door again to start cutting the diamond plate. Which is HARD. The jigsaw blade is too short (why?!) so sometimes if you tilt the saw accidentally, it will skip and smash the diamond plate. NOT good. Needless to say, there were some scratches, dents and bends put into the stuff. Whoops.
Then, I can't cut a straight line and the diamond plate won't fit under the door! So I end up spending 45 minutes (when it's still cool out!) grinding it away with a Dremel. A dremel. You understand why it took so long : P
Then I rivet it on...and do the whole top row first, which you can't do. It prevents it from lying flat. You MUST do from inside out. So I have to drill out three rivets (sounds like no big deal, but it is), and re-do it. Okay, finally it's all up.
So then I cut the diamond plate for the door. Get that riveted on.
Cut the diamond plate for the fenders. Get one on and then don't want to work in the heat to do the other...so I lay it aside figuring I'd do it in the evening.
Cut the diamond plate for the rear doors. Again, sounds easy. It's not. It's about 1 pm by this point. YEAH, exactly.
Go to put it on and surprise, I didn't look at the other door (they were open), and the handle on that one is lower. Instead of needing 16" pieces I need 12" pieces. Frig. Too hot to cut them down at that moment, so I just put them aside. Stupid things.
Put the remaining rivets into the roof (since I'd run out last time). Wire up the rear clearance light...and discover I don't know which is the ground wire and which is the hot wire. Crap. Gonna have to wait until the truck is hooked up.
Moving on...
Rivet the bum-chain loops onto the middle gate...and break a drill bit in half. Dang. Get a new drill bit and carry on...
Rivet the licence plate lamp on, the licence plate...inside I rivet the bridle hooks up. One of the four has some cracking on the plastic coating, so I opted to just hang three. Spacing looks better anyway.
By this point, it's 6:30 pm. Not even joking. I had two breaks to wolf down a slice of cold pizza and a bottle of water, the other to take care of personal matters from all that water : P The sun had risen and started its decent, and I hadn't even finished.
A wasp was buzzing around, angry I had plugged his hole where he was building a nest. Nice. Gonna need to plug all of the holes...Imagine a horse being stung in a trailer?! Hell!
_________
By the time I had cleaned up all of the tools, picked all the rivet posts off the ground and closed up the garage, it was 7 pm. I was dripping sweat. The sun was still shining. It was 30 degrees out plus I was standing on a concrete pad in jeans, sneakers and t-shirt. My thumb was cut, there were metal shards in my palms and I had a blood blister from pinching my thumb with the rivet gun when my hands were so sweaty I couldn't get a good grip on it.
I had used up that entire bag of rivets (100), plus another 50 from a bagfull I managed to find. 150 rivets installed. ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY.
I hung my trailer ties and discovered they weren't made the same. One fits nicely around the tie ring, the other is too tight. Stupid manufacturing processes.
I headed inside and had a shower. A cold shower. A long cold shower. Then the BF made me a breakfast sandwich (mmmmm....food) and I wolfed down another sliced of cold pizza. And a bowl of icecream. Laid there on the couch in front of the fan for 30 minutes (we don't have air conditioning). Then did a bunch of laundry, cleaned up the office, soaked my show clothes (which have been sitting around since...June?), organised the basement, packed all the spare trailer parts into a box and starting pulling out the items to stock the trailer with.
9:30 I had the laundry put away and the tidying done so I took the dog for a walk. Ran about the park for a little bit so she could stretch her legs. Then walked home. Took the back lane so I could have a look at the pony trailer...
Wow.
________
Tonight, I have to get groceries on my way home, and after supper I hope to finish the trailer. Seriously.
I need to:
- Make two cuts on the rear door diamond plate, and then screw it onto the doors.
- Rivet a hook over the door for my grooming bag.
- Hang the saddle rack.
- Connect the clearance light and rivet (2 rivets).
- Drill and rivet the right wheel well diamond plate.
- Drill the hole for the interior light and rivet (2 rivets).
- Caulk the holes in the trailer to keep the wasps out.
- Buy bum-chains and hang.
- Install old rubber mats.
- Attach the door-hold-openers.
DONE!
Seriously, look how short that list has become! : )
The dream is to haul it out of here on Wednesday evening. : ) The "DREAM".
Not that my horse is going anywhere soon. Between the scraped leg and the apparent abscess, he's down and out for the count. Fingers crossed he makes a comeback for the August 11th Gymkhana event... : )
In the mean time, we practice loading. Lots and lots of practice.
: )
And seriously, wait until you see the pictures of this bad-boy trailer. We're riding in style!
That's still not done.
So Monday morning I was up before the sun rose (almost) and was out the door to buy my rivets. Showed up at Fastenal 5 minutes before they opened and waited...
...and waited...
And tried the door twice, because I needed rivets.
Just as I got back in my car and was going to drive away (it was 10 after Seven), some kid drives up on a scooter, parks on the sidewalk and unlocks the door.
I told myself it's probably the first time he was late to work. That's it. He's just not some kid who can't arrive on time and leaves customers outside waiting.
...but judging by how difficult it was for him to find me the right rivet...
Regardless, I bought 100, thinking I only needed 50 (they wouldn't do any less, and they're normally sold by the box of 500), and some new jigsaw blades to cut the diamond plate, and was out the door and headed home.
Right away I started caulking and did all the stuff that needed doing. So the trailer is officially caulked.
Then I had a quick breakfast (1/2 bowl of cereal) and was out the door again to start cutting the diamond plate. Which is HARD. The jigsaw blade is too short (why?!) so sometimes if you tilt the saw accidentally, it will skip and smash the diamond plate. NOT good. Needless to say, there were some scratches, dents and bends put into the stuff. Whoops.
Then, I can't cut a straight line and the diamond plate won't fit under the door! So I end up spending 45 minutes (when it's still cool out!) grinding it away with a Dremel. A dremel. You understand why it took so long : P
Then I rivet it on...and do the whole top row first, which you can't do. It prevents it from lying flat. You MUST do from inside out. So I have to drill out three rivets (sounds like no big deal, but it is), and re-do it. Okay, finally it's all up.
So then I cut the diamond plate for the door. Get that riveted on.
Cut the diamond plate for the fenders. Get one on and then don't want to work in the heat to do the other...so I lay it aside figuring I'd do it in the evening.
Cut the diamond plate for the rear doors. Again, sounds easy. It's not. It's about 1 pm by this point. YEAH, exactly.
Go to put it on and surprise, I didn't look at the other door (they were open), and the handle on that one is lower. Instead of needing 16" pieces I need 12" pieces. Frig. Too hot to cut them down at that moment, so I just put them aside. Stupid things.
Put the remaining rivets into the roof (since I'd run out last time). Wire up the rear clearance light...and discover I don't know which is the ground wire and which is the hot wire. Crap. Gonna have to wait until the truck is hooked up.
Moving on...
Rivet the bum-chain loops onto the middle gate...and break a drill bit in half. Dang. Get a new drill bit and carry on...
Rivet the licence plate lamp on, the licence plate...inside I rivet the bridle hooks up. One of the four has some cracking on the plastic coating, so I opted to just hang three. Spacing looks better anyway.
By this point, it's 6:30 pm. Not even joking. I had two breaks to wolf down a slice of cold pizza and a bottle of water, the other to take care of personal matters from all that water : P The sun had risen and started its decent, and I hadn't even finished.
A wasp was buzzing around, angry I had plugged his hole where he was building a nest. Nice. Gonna need to plug all of the holes...Imagine a horse being stung in a trailer?! Hell!
_________
By the time I had cleaned up all of the tools, picked all the rivet posts off the ground and closed up the garage, it was 7 pm. I was dripping sweat. The sun was still shining. It was 30 degrees out plus I was standing on a concrete pad in jeans, sneakers and t-shirt. My thumb was cut, there were metal shards in my palms and I had a blood blister from pinching my thumb with the rivet gun when my hands were so sweaty I couldn't get a good grip on it.
I had used up that entire bag of rivets (100), plus another 50 from a bagfull I managed to find. 150 rivets installed. ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY.
I hung my trailer ties and discovered they weren't made the same. One fits nicely around the tie ring, the other is too tight. Stupid manufacturing processes.
I headed inside and had a shower. A cold shower. A long cold shower. Then the BF made me a breakfast sandwich (mmmmm....food) and I wolfed down another sliced of cold pizza. And a bowl of icecream. Laid there on the couch in front of the fan for 30 minutes (we don't have air conditioning). Then did a bunch of laundry, cleaned up the office, soaked my show clothes (which have been sitting around since...June?), organised the basement, packed all the spare trailer parts into a box and starting pulling out the items to stock the trailer with.
9:30 I had the laundry put away and the tidying done so I took the dog for a walk. Ran about the park for a little bit so she could stretch her legs. Then walked home. Took the back lane so I could have a look at the pony trailer...
Wow.
________
Tonight, I have to get groceries on my way home, and after supper I hope to finish the trailer. Seriously.
I need to:
- Make two cuts on the rear door diamond plate, and then screw it onto the doors.
- Rivet a hook over the door for my grooming bag.
- Hang the saddle rack.
- Connect the clearance light and rivet (2 rivets).
- Drill and rivet the right wheel well diamond plate.
- Drill the hole for the interior light and rivet (2 rivets).
- Caulk the holes in the trailer to keep the wasps out.
- Buy bum-chains and hang.
- Install old rubber mats.
- Attach the door-hold-openers.
DONE!
Seriously, look how short that list has become! : )
The dream is to haul it out of here on Wednesday evening. : ) The "DREAM".
Not that my horse is going anywhere soon. Between the scraped leg and the apparent abscess, he's down and out for the count. Fingers crossed he makes a comeback for the August 11th Gymkhana event... : )
In the mean time, we practice loading. Lots and lots of practice.
: )
And seriously, wait until you see the pictures of this bad-boy trailer. We're riding in style!
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Crack of Dawn.
It's late, I'm tired, but for some reason, I just HAVE to blow through this post. Otherwise, I don't think I'll manage to sleep, instead mulling over the last couple of days.
Really, nothing significant, but rather, just busy.
Mr. Moon is healing, but the scab is big, his swelling has come WAY down, he's clearly lame at trot, and we're not riding. Between H and I, we've got him iced, poulticed and dermagel'd, so it's just a matter of time. As we've been working on getting the right hind back to normal, I noticed his left hind had a little red spot right at the coronet. I figured I was being paranoid, as I noticed it the same day he skinned his leg, and paranoia is pretty much my middle name. And last name. And probably my first and christian names too...probably my mom's name if I think about it...
Where was I going? Right. Red spot.
Called it paranoia and carried on. By Friday (?) or Saturday, I pointed it out to H, telling her that I'm fairly certain I've become a hypochondriac, but for my horse, and that he's gonna blow an abscess out his coronary. You know, because if you're already out one leg, why not make it two? That's why they have four, isn't it?
By this point, he had a little cracking on the hoof right at the coronary, it was appearing to be bulging out, and it was squishy where the rest of the coronary wasn't. And red.
Paranoid?
Well, H saw it too. And we both clearly can't be paranoid. That or I'm rubbing off on her. My horse is a horse-a-chondriac.
Tomorrow, I'll try some home remedies on it and see if I can get it to blow. Which blows (ha), because he's FINALLY got beautiful hooves, they've not splitting from all the dryness and stamping, and we managed to trim out the last ugly abscess. Surprise, new one that'll take a good year to grow out. Friggen. Probably from trotting on those confounded stones up the road I bet you. Pardon me while I beat my head on the desk for a moment...
Right. So icing and treating and not riding.
What else can a girl do?
She can work on the pony trailer.
Up at the crack of dawn, house sitting so getting everyone here fed and walked, and then over to my own place. Saturday my dad came over, and we got the entire pony trailer wired! Yippee! Took me numerous trips to the store, and I cheaped out and used the wire I had instead of buying more, so there's no proper color coding. W/e. What's important, is everything lights up the way it's supposed to. The electric brakes are installed, the break-away kit is installed, the tail lamps, licence plate lamp, marker lights, everything.
Took ALL day, in the hot sun. Discovered why these brazilian cut jeans (you know the ones...where you can't sit down without exposing yourself...which in hindsight is genius when crawling around under a trailer : P ) ...well, I managed to tan JUST a patch on my back. Just a patch. The rest, paste-y white. Looks like I forgot to scrub in the shower. Nice. Classy.
So post wiring, back to the house, walk some dogs, back to the horses, feed, ice, back to house for some rest.
Morning? Rush home to try to caulk before it heats up too much. This RV caulking is uber flexible, however it sets up REALLY fast in the heat. Like too fast to smooth out. So of course, I can't find the caulking gun. : P Thankfully, Gramps saved the day and there was one in his old tool box! : ) Thanks gramps!
It's my first time caulking. Yup. Crazy. Always watched, never done it. Looking NICE if I can brag a little bit. Except, nature hates me (clearly) and it starts to rain.
OYE. Rain drops totally mess up the caulk, so I'm running around to cover the caulk which isn't dry. Grab a tarp, turns out it's really dirty and deposit copious amounts of dirt and grass onto the caulk. Beat head on fender.
Rain lets up, I caulk for another 30 minutes until it gets too hot and sets up on me. DANG. Nearly done, but not quite.
Moving on. I work on my interior light and Gerry-rigged switch. End up ripping the nozzle right off the crazy glue trying to open it. After a LOT of hard work and ingenuity, realize I missed considering one thing and now the light is slightly off center. ARUGH!
In the end, need more rivets. Everything depends on rivets. Rivet store doesn't open until 7 am tomorrow. Guess where I'm headed?
I do manage to drill some holes and tighten all the lugs on the new brakes. Then I buff the old hub caps really nice, and since the insides are rusting, I paint them. Then I decide, since I'm buffed chrome and some patches have rusted, to paint the rust spots with silver paint.
...then I decide to customize my trailer, just a little. THAT will be a surprise for when I remember to bring my camera card home and can actually take a picture of it. New reflectors too.
One heck of a nice trailer. REALLY nice looking trailer. Hope like heck to get that diamond plate on tomorrow and call the whole thing done. Would make my day.
But I'd best get my butt in bed. I got rivets to buy at the crack of dawn!!
Really, nothing significant, but rather, just busy.
Mr. Moon is healing, but the scab is big, his swelling has come WAY down, he's clearly lame at trot, and we're not riding. Between H and I, we've got him iced, poulticed and dermagel'd, so it's just a matter of time. As we've been working on getting the right hind back to normal, I noticed his left hind had a little red spot right at the coronet. I figured I was being paranoid, as I noticed it the same day he skinned his leg, and paranoia is pretty much my middle name. And last name. And probably my first and christian names too...probably my mom's name if I think about it...
Where was I going? Right. Red spot.
Called it paranoia and carried on. By Friday (?) or Saturday, I pointed it out to H, telling her that I'm fairly certain I've become a hypochondriac, but for my horse, and that he's gonna blow an abscess out his coronary. You know, because if you're already out one leg, why not make it two? That's why they have four, isn't it?
By this point, he had a little cracking on the hoof right at the coronary, it was appearing to be bulging out, and it was squishy where the rest of the coronary wasn't. And red.
Paranoid?
Well, H saw it too. And we both clearly can't be paranoid. That or I'm rubbing off on her. My horse is a horse-a-chondriac.
Tomorrow, I'll try some home remedies on it and see if I can get it to blow. Which blows (ha), because he's FINALLY got beautiful hooves, they've not splitting from all the dryness and stamping, and we managed to trim out the last ugly abscess. Surprise, new one that'll take a good year to grow out. Friggen. Probably from trotting on those confounded stones up the road I bet you. Pardon me while I beat my head on the desk for a moment...
Right. So icing and treating and not riding.
What else can a girl do?
She can work on the pony trailer.
Up at the crack of dawn, house sitting so getting everyone here fed and walked, and then over to my own place. Saturday my dad came over, and we got the entire pony trailer wired! Yippee! Took me numerous trips to the store, and I cheaped out and used the wire I had instead of buying more, so there's no proper color coding. W/e. What's important, is everything lights up the way it's supposed to. The electric brakes are installed, the break-away kit is installed, the tail lamps, licence plate lamp, marker lights, everything.
Took ALL day, in the hot sun. Discovered why these brazilian cut jeans (you know the ones...where you can't sit down without exposing yourself...which in hindsight is genius when crawling around under a trailer : P ) ...well, I managed to tan JUST a patch on my back. Just a patch. The rest, paste-y white. Looks like I forgot to scrub in the shower. Nice. Classy.
So post wiring, back to the house, walk some dogs, back to the horses, feed, ice, back to house for some rest.
Morning? Rush home to try to caulk before it heats up too much. This RV caulking is uber flexible, however it sets up REALLY fast in the heat. Like too fast to smooth out. So of course, I can't find the caulking gun. : P Thankfully, Gramps saved the day and there was one in his old tool box! : ) Thanks gramps!
It's my first time caulking. Yup. Crazy. Always watched, never done it. Looking NICE if I can brag a little bit. Except, nature hates me (clearly) and it starts to rain.
OYE. Rain drops totally mess up the caulk, so I'm running around to cover the caulk which isn't dry. Grab a tarp, turns out it's really dirty and deposit copious amounts of dirt and grass onto the caulk. Beat head on fender.
Rain lets up, I caulk for another 30 minutes until it gets too hot and sets up on me. DANG. Nearly done, but not quite.
Moving on. I work on my interior light and Gerry-rigged switch. End up ripping the nozzle right off the crazy glue trying to open it. After a LOT of hard work and ingenuity, realize I missed considering one thing and now the light is slightly off center. ARUGH!
In the end, need more rivets. Everything depends on rivets. Rivet store doesn't open until 7 am tomorrow. Guess where I'm headed?
I do manage to drill some holes and tighten all the lugs on the new brakes. Then I buff the old hub caps really nice, and since the insides are rusting, I paint them. Then I decide, since I'm buffed chrome and some patches have rusted, to paint the rust spots with silver paint.
...then I decide to customize my trailer, just a little. THAT will be a surprise for when I remember to bring my camera card home and can actually take a picture of it. New reflectors too.
One heck of a nice trailer. REALLY nice looking trailer. Hope like heck to get that diamond plate on tomorrow and call the whole thing done. Would make my day.
But I'd best get my butt in bed. I got rivets to buy at the crack of dawn!!
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Tag. You're out.
And the lameness monster hath tagged Mr. Moon down and out for the count.
And now, for the story of the destruction...
Of course, I was really, really looking forward to our Wednesday ride. The jumps were still up, H might be able to join me over them once and I was still on cloud nine after hearing the girls say my little pony wasn't against jumping.
It therefore, should be no surprise that as I pulled into the yard and H was standing beside the wash rack with my horse that I would bound out of my car, huge smile on my face. I was THRILLED to see her and ecstatic about our chance to ride.
I continued to bound across the gravel towards them, noting offhandedly that her horse was wandering the ring and that she was hosing Moon's legs. I greeted her cheerfully, my mind assuring me that she must not like dirty legs on horses or something. I mean, why else would one hose a horse's leg?
...perhaps, because of THIS:
Yes, as H gently broke the news of Moon's injury to me, that giant smile faded away and I realized that my hamster must run a little slow. Or be dead. Because it became GLARINGLY obvious that Moon was injured and she was treating him. Not prepping for some jumping.
Oye.
My following reaction stunned me a little. I expected myself to panic and go into hysterics. I mean, it was an ugly wound. But I also knew that if there was something more that could be done or that was urgent, H would have addressed it already. So instead, this was simply, what it was. Bring on the cold hosing.
Our best guess is that he kicked out and scraped it. Along a fence, the boards in the run-in? Who knows. We'll probably never know, barring for finding a chunk of skin flapping in the summer breeze. Regardless, the wound needed no sutures, it was already drying (clearly not fresh...it must have happened over night perhaps? Early in the morning? Who knows with horses). So I slathered on the Dermagel, put copious amounts of SWAT around it and sent him back out into the field.
The leg, as you can see, is very puffy. Swollen and hot. And stiff. He walks normally, but is head bobbing at a trot. No surprise there.
This morning I went out at the crack of dawn, fed the ponies and then cold hosed Mr. Moon again. Slathered on more DermaGel, SWAT and then applied SoreNoMore liniment and poultice on the leg. It looks like a children's horrible finger painting job. But hopefully, it does the trick.
I suspect, this will take awhile to heal and go down. I'm hoping and hopeful that he'll recover fully, as it appears to be superficial and not deep into any tissues. Hopefully the swelling goes down, we avoid infection and in a couple weeks, he's back to normal.
Unfortunately, there is time we'll have to wait out. Swelling takes time. Will we still make the August Gymkhana? Not likely on Mr. Moon. And my weightloss plans, my trail rides with E, jumping with H...all on hold. The only thing that keeps me from bawling like an infant is that we've already given up on show season.
Then again, a big part of me, having now owned my own horse for over a year, recognizes lameness as an inevitable part of horse ownership. And you can guarantee that your horse WILL injure itself. It's just a matter of when and how close to a show. : P So unless it's requiring veterinary attention or is debilitating, thank your lucky stars that you'll both bounce back from it, and carry on. With horses, it ALWAYS could've been a whole hell of a lot worse.
And now, for the story of the destruction...
Of course, I was really, really looking forward to our Wednesday ride. The jumps were still up, H might be able to join me over them once and I was still on cloud nine after hearing the girls say my little pony wasn't against jumping.
It therefore, should be no surprise that as I pulled into the yard and H was standing beside the wash rack with my horse that I would bound out of my car, huge smile on my face. I was THRILLED to see her and ecstatic about our chance to ride.
What we SHOULD have been jumping bareback last night...
I continued to bound across the gravel towards them, noting offhandedly that her horse was wandering the ring and that she was hosing Moon's legs. I greeted her cheerfully, my mind assuring me that she must not like dirty legs on horses or something. I mean, why else would one hose a horse's leg?
...perhaps, because of THIS:
A hot, swollen, ugly mess.
Yes, as H gently broke the news of Moon's injury to me, that giant smile faded away and I realized that my hamster must run a little slow. Or be dead. Because it became GLARINGLY obvious that Moon was injured and she was treating him. Not prepping for some jumping.
Oye.
My following reaction stunned me a little. I expected myself to panic and go into hysterics. I mean, it was an ugly wound. But I also knew that if there was something more that could be done or that was urgent, H would have addressed it already. So instead, this was simply, what it was. Bring on the cold hosing.
Our best guess is that he kicked out and scraped it. Along a fence, the boards in the run-in? Who knows. We'll probably never know, barring for finding a chunk of skin flapping in the summer breeze. Regardless, the wound needed no sutures, it was already drying (clearly not fresh...it must have happened over night perhaps? Early in the morning? Who knows with horses). So I slathered on the Dermagel, put copious amounts of SWAT around it and sent him back out into the field.
Eww.
The leg, as you can see, is very puffy. Swollen and hot. And stiff. He walks normally, but is head bobbing at a trot. No surprise there.
PUFFY. : (
This morning I went out at the crack of dawn, fed the ponies and then cold hosed Mr. Moon again. Slathered on more DermaGel, SWAT and then applied SoreNoMore liniment and poultice on the leg. It looks like a children's horrible finger painting job. But hopefully, it does the trick.
Artistic Leg Painting - DermaGel, SWAT, Sore No More Liniment
I suspect, this will take awhile to heal and go down. I'm hoping and hopeful that he'll recover fully, as it appears to be superficial and not deep into any tissues. Hopefully the swelling goes down, we avoid infection and in a couple weeks, he's back to normal.
Unfortunately, there is time we'll have to wait out. Swelling takes time. Will we still make the August Gymkhana? Not likely on Mr. Moon. And my weightloss plans, my trail rides with E, jumping with H...all on hold. The only thing that keeps me from bawling like an infant is that we've already given up on show season.
Then again, a big part of me, having now owned my own horse for over a year, recognizes lameness as an inevitable part of horse ownership. And you can guarantee that your horse WILL injure itself. It's just a matter of when and how close to a show. : P So unless it's requiring veterinary attention or is debilitating, thank your lucky stars that you'll both bounce back from it, and carry on. With horses, it ALWAYS could've been a whole hell of a lot worse.
It could be a lot worse...at least that's what I keep telling myself.
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